One woman's path through doula training, childrearing, and a computer science Ph. D. program

Sunday, March 27, 2011

Should I come to my partner's first prenatal visit?

Yes, unless it is logistically impossible.

Being newly pregnant can be an emotional experience, especially if you have (or she has) been trying to get pregnant for a long time, and even more so if you have been trying not to.  You should be there to support if a shoulder is needed, encourage if a smile is needed, and just be present if your company is needed.

Let's assume for the rest of this post that the pregnancy is a welcome event.

Beyond what she, the mother, needs, the first prenatal checkup is usually where the pregnancy is confirmed, and you will hear the baby's heart beat for the first time.  This is really neat, and if nothing else, you should be there for this moment: the moment you receive proof that inside this lovely woman is another life.

This is also a good time to interview your midwife or doctor to make sure you get along on a very basic level.  Do you "gibe?" Do you feel good about this person?  Forget the day of delivery -- in a hospital environment, it is a toss-up whether or not this person will attend the actual birth -- what matters now is that you will spend quite a bit of time together.

Taking a typical low-risk prenatal visit with an obstetrician (duration of about 15 minutes) and the timeline of maternity care outlined by Drs. Sears, assuming the first prenatal visit is at 8 weeks gestation as noted by BabyCenter (not unlikely, as your missed period is at 6 weeks), you will spend approximately 2 3/4 hours locked in a room with this midwife or obstetrician. And that is a conservative estimate.
Here's the math:
One visit per month from weeks 8 to 28 = 5 visits
One visit per 2 weeks for 8 weeks (weeks 28 through 36) = 2 visits
One visit per week until born (weeks 36 to, say, 40, which is average) = 4 visits
Total visits = 11
Visit length is 15 minutes each, times 11 visits = 161 minutes = 2 hours, 41 minutes

In conclusion, yes, take the time off of work and join your partner on her first prenatal visit.  Yes, go -- be supportive, be present, and be positive.

Amendment

A note about the case of miscarriage:  If  you attended the ultrasound to confirm the pregnancy and see the heartbeat, you should also attend the ultrasound to confirm the miscarriage.  Remember that you are in this together.  Because it is "we're pregnant," (not "she's pregnant") then it is also "we miscarried."  She did not miscarry alone.  When you attend the latter, more difficult, ultrasound with her, it will help her see that.


Thursday, March 3, 2011

A very short birth: Emergency Caesarean and doula support

What follows is my account of an emergency C-section birth, from the perspective of a support person.  This birth changed my perspective as a doula.

Clay and Erin are the perfect young couple.  At our first meeting, they hugged and touched and giggled, rubbing Erin's round belly and kissing each other sweetly.  He was a military man with a hint of a southern drawl; she was a fair-skinned, red-haired maiden glowing in her pregnancy and reminding me of Loreena McKennit earth-mother songs.  In her belly incubated baby Amber, soft and warm, caressed from all sides by her mother's lovely warmth.

The morning of baby Amber's birth, Erin went to her scheduled prenatal appointment and was delightfully surprised (yet slightly apprehensive) to find that she was 3cm dilated.  "Today or tomorrow," Dr. Draper said, smoothing his grey moustache.

At 5 that evening, Erin called and told me of her first contractions.  "They feel different," she said, comparing them to Braxton-Hicks contractions in her excited, fluttery voice.  We checked in again at 7, when the contractions had suddenly intensified.  I suggested keeping hydrated, taking a shower, or taking a walk.  I remembered back to another recent birth in which the early labor contractions suddenly got intense, and how terrified I was that I was missing active labor.  But when we arrived at the hospital, we were just at 3cm.  I know that every mother is different, and every birth is different

At 8pm Clay called.

"We are thinking of going to the hospital," he said, and confessed that Erin was vomiting profusely with and through every contraction.  They were having a hard time keeping on top of them.

"Can you wait for me to come?" I asked.  "Help Erin take a shower or a bath.  I will be at your house in an hour."

"I don't know," he said.  "I'll call you back."

I packed my bags.  Five minutes, ten, fifteen went by as I sat by the door with my bags.  Suddenly, I knew that they had gone to the hospital.  I left.  Fifteen minutes on the road before I got a text message from Clay: "Come."  They were at the hospital.

Terb-ulent contractions

I arrived at 9:20 to find Erin in a gown in the bed, monitored.  Contractions were light and infrequent. I talked with Clay and Erin until the nurse came.  She said Erin was between 3 and 4cm dilated, 90% effaced, at +1 station, with no change from admittance an hour prior.  She was administered terbutaline, an injection just under the skin (usually in the arm), to stop labor.

Of course, as soon as I got home, I looked this up.  Terbutaline, or terb, for short, is frequently used to stop preterm labor, but its use here, as a labor inhibitor, is controversial because controlled studies are lacking.  In 1997, the Food and Drug Administration (FDA) wrote:
In the absence of data establishing the effectiveness and safety of the drug/device, FDA is alerting practitioners, home health care agencies, insurance carriers and others that continuous subcutaneous administration of terbutaline sulfate has not been demonstrated to be effective and is potentially dangerous.
In this case, it was not a continuous dose but an intermittent one, and it was not for preterm labor but for a full-term baby.

I did not fully understand the reason for administering terb until I had a chance to glance over the charts that the nurse collected from the contractions and baby's heart beat.  With and after every contraction, the baby's heart rate plummeted.  Not just a little.  A lot.  I did not know this until much, much later.

By 10:15pm, contractions had picked back up with terbutaline wearing off.  And, as before, Erin vomited violently through every contraction.  Clay held a bucket by the bed; the nurse and I took turns emptying it in the sink.  There was exactly enough time to clean the bucket and get it back to the bed before another contraction required its assistance.

But the baby's heart rate was again decelerating with each contraction.  The nurse started the oxygen mask flowing and called the doctor.

I suggested some position changes.  We tried the hands and knees position on the bed.  Erin hated it... but over the next two contractions, the heart rate deceleration showed a marked improvement.

Fluid around the cord

At 10:30, just fifteen minutes after our position changes and oxygen mask, Dr. Draper arrived in a shirt and tie under a white gown.  Barely greeting the couple and not glancing at me, he looked at the charts as the nurse caught him up.

"Yes, I see that," he murmured to the paper trail of contraction bumps and baby dips.  He turned to the nurse.  "Who is the anaesthesiologist on call?" he asked as my heart sank.  My heart sank and my blood pressure rose and my face burned.

I glared at Dr. Draper with all my might.  I glared at him as strongly as one woman could glare at a man.  I glared at him and shot little lightning bolts from my eyes as I sat nearby Erin's bed, and as I watched her glance sweetly, sadly, timidly, frightenedly at Clay.  I glared because I knew that with just a few more minutes, with just a few more position changes, with just a few more attempts we could fix this thing.  We could have our birth.

Dr. Draper turned to Erin and Clay and pushed his glasses up on his nose.

"Fetal intolerance to labor," he said.  "I can prove it to you," he added as he asked for a portable ultrasound machine.  He called up on the black and white display a blurry image of some moving black and white bits.  Erin had a contraction and started puking.  Clay looked at her face and at the bucket and at the monitor and at her face.

"You see that there?" Dr. Draper said to us.  "See, that's the umbilical cord.  That's the contraction, and here it's being compressed. There is no fluid around the cord."  As the contraction ended, he pushed aside the machine and waited to have Erin's undivided attention.

"We need to get the baby out now. You know how I know? Because I've seen it before.  I have seen this a hundred times before. I have made this mistake before.  If we wait, the baby will not do well.  We are so early in labor, and already the baby is not handling it well.  We cannot wait.  I have seen this before."  Erin nodded throughout and agreed that whatever is safer for her baby she is willing to do.

With my hands folded and my voice calm, I turned to Erin and Clay and asked, quietly: "Do you have any questions?"  Erin and Clay shook their heads.

"May I be in the OR with them?" I asked, ready for a fight.

"Yes," said Dr. Draper and walked out of the room with some mumbled instructions to the nurses.  He called the c-section at 10:40pm.

The room started bustling.  One nurse gave Erin another shot of terb just as a contraction was starting. Clay readied the bucket.  Another nurse brought an OR kit -- hair net, gown, and mask -- and placed it on the bed for Clay.  "One more, please," I said; the nurse nodded and left, reappearing with another set.  Erin and Clay both received arm bands and a tiny one was prepared for the infant.  Other infant items materialized: a baby warmer, a bassinet.  As this was happening, I went to the nurse and asked:

"What is Dr. Draper's c-section rate?"

"Oh, I don't know," she said.  "Probably like the rest of the hospital.  Thirty-three percent."  I was interested to know this because this particular hospital is privately-owned and does not publish its birth statistics.  The c-section rate was at the US average.  Knowing this added fuel to my already-burning fire and I seethed, confident in my opinion that the doctor had made a hasty call.

"Do you guys do VBAC?" I asked, meaning vaginal birth after c-section, an option for many women.  I kept thinking about Erin's beautiful round belly.

"No, we can't do VBAC here," she replied sadly.

Erin was wheeled to the preparation room; Clay and I were escorted to the recovery room to wait. This empty, lifeless room had two hospital beds, sterile floors, and a chilly atmosphere.  We dressed in our yellow hospital gowns.

"I guess it's time to tell the folks," Clay said after several minutes of silence, and began sending text messages on his phone.

We tried to play guess-the-time-of-birth, but the mood was somber.

Birth

Finally, the nurse called us in to the operating room.  Erin was on the table with bright lights beaming down on her tired, worried face.  Clay's touch was clearly soothing, comforting.  I stood nearby with the camera and took pictures, explaining what I saw.  I was careful not to take any photos of the incision, as the doctor requested.

"Now he is cutting the fat layer," I said.

The nurse exclaimed: "Not that you have hardly any fat layer at all!"

"Now he is opening the uterus.  Now he is breaking the bag of waters."  The suction device picked up dark, chunky fluid, stained with meconium, and transported it through a clear plastic tube to a receptacle.  "Breathe through this part," I suggested, remembering the previous c-section that I attended, in which the doctor wrestled the baby out over the course of what seemed like an hour.  "You'll feel some tugging. Now he is lifting the baby's head.  The head is born.  Now the rest of the body."  There was not as much tugging as I anticipated as the baby entered the world, a dozen hands holding her up.
Dr. Draper delivers baby Amber as nurses stand by.
Photo by PhDoula.

Time of birth: 11:26pm.  The nurses took the baby to a warming station and vigorous rubbing began.  Unlike the previous c-section that I had seen, Clay was not allowed to go to the baby.  Clay and I watched both Erin and Amber.  Every few minutes, I would ask: "Can Clay go to the baby now?" but the answer was always no.

Dr. Draper talked as he operated. "Yes.  I have seen this before.  The cord was around the baby's head, and it was being compressed between the head and the uterus. It's called a nuchal cord."

After cleaning the area thoroughly, Dr. Draper continued: "It used to be cool to have 10, 15 years of experience.  But I have been doing this for 25 years, and it makes me sound old."

I asked: "How many babies have you delivered?"

Dr. Draper said, "Thousands."

Choosing his scythe-shaped needle and clear thread, which reminded me of liquid cat whiskers, Dr. Draper began sewing.  "Hmm, yes, I think I can sew this together in just one layer.  Look at that.  It just lines up together perfectly."

Shocked, I asked: "One layer? Is that safe?"

He replied in the same pensive tone: "Yes, in this case it is."

I paused.  "Can Erin have a VBAC after this kind of stitching?"

"Yes, I don't see why not."

"But you don't do VBAC."

"No, we can't do VBAC here at this hospital.  But I can give a referral to someone who does."

Afterwards, I learned that the two- versus one-layer stitching debate was a sore spot for many women.  The debate goes as follows.  One study (Bujold) found that single-layer stitching (discussion, editorial [PDF]) showed an increase in cases of uterine rupture in VBAC patients over two-layer stitching.  However, the study had two serious flaws.  First, the hospital staff was not as familiar with doing the two-layer stitching as single-layer stitching (so expertise was an issue).  Second, the materials used to do the closure were not as strong as we have today (so equipment was an issue).  Furthermore, there is good evidence that, when the fibers of the uterus line up well (as was the case here), single-layer stitching is just as good as two-layer stitching, in that it is strong, it has good structural integrity, and it is unwilling to be compromised under stress (e.g., through a subsequent trial of labor).  Although some doctors simply will not even attempt VBAC with single-layer stitching, others will.  Unfortunately, much of it depends on the doctor and on his or her insurance carrier.

The nurses brought a loosely-swaddled bundle to Clay.  "Congratulations," they whispered, as they handed baby Amber to him.  Clay held her like a freshly-baked loaf of bread, typical of the new father, and stooped low so that Erin could also see her sweet newborn face.   They gazed together into her sleepy face with misty eyes, huge smiles, and little kisses.

After the stitching was over, Erin was bumped from the OR bed to the regular bed, and was wheeled to the recovery room where Clay and I had paced the confines of this sterile enclosure just an hour earlier.  The nurses took baby Amber from Clay's hesitant arms to the nursery.

After a few minutes in the recovery room: "Does the baby have a name?" the nursery nurse, in charge of the infants, asked as she entered the room.

"Yes -- Amber," Erin replied.

"We need to keep Amber for a few minutes in the baby warmer.  She is cold."

While we waited, we talked about the baby and how strange it was not to be pregnant anymore.  Erin and Clay talked about which family to tell, whom to call.  We examined in great detail every single dial and switch on the walls.

Every time the nurse came in, I asked: "Can Clay go to the baby?" or "Can Erin have the baby now?" or "Is the baby coming soon?"  Twice, I sent Clay to go find the nursery and look at the baby through the window.  Both times, he reported back that the baby looked fine.

It was clear that my job had become the nagger.  I nagged during the surgery, and I was nagging now.

Finally they brought the baby.

Breastfeeding

As baby Amber was wheeled into the room, I had the impression I was watching a wedding.  Erin and Clay looked at the baby, and I looked at the parents looking at the baby.  Their faces expressed unbounded love and devotion, the kind of eternity people everywhere seek but do not know where to find.  Their arms reached out to this new life.

 He handed her to Erin.

"Oh, my little bird," Erin cooed, her eyes filling with tears.

I sat off to the side and snapped photos of the new family.  In a while, Amber began to open her mouth wide and lick Erin's shirt: clear signs of interest in nursing.  Swooning, I took more photos.

"Yo, doula," Clay said, "get over here."  We laughed as I helped position Amber on Erin's chest.  This was not an easy task given that Erin was completely numb below the ribs.

In the wee hours of the morning, Erin, Clay, and Amber were sleepily settled in their room, and I left.


Conclusion

We all go into births with some prejudices, whether or not we know about them.  For some doulas, it is the idea that the epidural is the root of all evil; some doulas see birth as a magical gathering of rainbows and unicorns as a baby emerges perfectly into the world.  Students of  Ina May describe contractions as "rushes" so that the mother imagines them as energy rather than pain.  For me, it was a distrust of medical doctors and especially their reasons for conducting c-sections.

At every step of the way, mentally, I challenged Dr. Draper, distrusting his reasoning and his methods, because doctors are prone to disregard the mother and treat only the condition.  Because doctors hate to wait for a birth to come around on its own.  Because vaginal birth is inconvenient and c-sections are faster.  I challenged him when he made the call for a c-section; I distrusted the size of his incision; I questioned his choice of suturing method (and what an expert I am, right?); I frowned at the separation time between mother and baby.

When I went home after Amber's birth, I researched all of the things Dr. Draper said, and read a great deal.  I worried about Erin and Clay: were they upset over this turn of events?  Were they unhappy with their c-section?  I had no idea, but other reading I had done (e.g., Pushed, Woman in the Body) suggested that women frequently have negative affect after an unscheduled c-section.  In my research I was both convinced in the doctor's expertise and embarrassed at my emotional reaction to the events of the birth.  So then in a sort of apology, I sent Erin and Clay this e-mail:
Congratulations on your baby girl!!!!  Amber is so small and sweet.  :-) 
I just want to follow up with you and make sure you know that you and Clay totally made the right call.  In fact, it wasn't your decision to make at all: Late deceleration is a definite cause for alarm, and persistent late deceleration at 3-4cm is a very good reason for a C-section birth.  Amber wasn't doing well with labor, and didn't have enough oxygen in reserve to make it through the contraction.  During a contraction, there was a normal decrease in the amount of oxygen exchanged between you and Amber, but she didn't have enough oxygen stored up to make it through each contraction. 
Please don't feel sad; you did the right thing, and you had the right birth. 
You and Clay were rockstars during the labor and during Amber's birth; you were both doing so well!  You are an amazing and powerful birth-woman.

When we met for a postpartum meeting, Erin and Clay confided that they know they did the right thing, and there was no doubt in their minds. There were no hard feelings between them and their birth.

I was relieved.

This birth changed me as a doula.  I became a better listener, and a better question-asker.  I became more patient and more humble.

Should we go into interventions blindly?  No.  But we should be prepared for everything... and we should ask questions until we are satisfied with the answer; until we know, without a doubt, that we are doing the right thing.

Sunday, February 27, 2011

An amazing Facebook birth

This post is about Amy, a mom that recently had a baby while updating her friends on her 48-hour labor progress in real-time.  As any mom that has gone through labor knows, this is no easy task!  I commend Amy on her unique labor coping strategy of Facebook-ing while in labor.


About Amy

Amy and I go way back:  We first met in middle school and went though tenth grade together, at which point my family and I moved across the US.  Though we have kept in touch, our closeness and level of intimate knowledge of one-another could not have been possible without Facebook.

I found out that Amy was pregnant with her third child when she posted an update saying her first prenatal appointment was coming up soon.... at 38 weeks.  Difficult financial times meant an unfortunate lack of health insurance, which prevented her from seeking prenatal care until fairly late in the pregnancy.  Luckily, all was well with her and her baby. The baby was growing happily and Amy had no risk factors for things like gestational diabetes or pre-eclampsia.  (However, over the next few weeks and prenatal appointments, the doctor was increasingly antsy to get the baby out -- threatening induction and c-section. My opinion? His reasoning was that the baby would be better off in his care than in the womb of a woman that would forego prenatal care.)

Nine days before Amy's due date (T-9), she mentions how difficult it is to be so pregnant:
Well this baby should be due anytime between now and 3 1/2 weeks from now... Wonder when he will want to come. Hard to roll over in bed!

Amy and I talked over Facebook; she told me this is likely her last baby, and her priority for her birth experience is to birth naturally, and especially without Pitocin, a synthetic oxytocin used to speed up labor or increase the strength of labor contractions.  Her second baby was induced with Pitocin, and she had a difficult time with the labor.

Do you have a doula?

Of course, I asked if Amy had hired a doula.

"No," she replied.  "Isn't it kind of late?  I mean, I am almost 39 weeks along."  Then: "Also, I don't think we can afford a doula."

Will you be my friend's doula?
That night I sent out an e-mail to a volunteer doula organization mailing list asking if anyone in her area would be willing to consider a volunteer birth, due between now and three weeks from now.  The next day, I got an e-mail back with the name of a doula, Joanne, residing an hour and a half away from Amy -- which I immediately forwarded along.  Amy called her.  Joanne said yes.

Joanne explained that there were so few women in her general geographic area that a) wanted a natural birth, b) knew what a doula was, and c) were considering hiring one.  Because of this, she was having a hard time meeting the requirements for the number of births attended, for certification through her organization.

Five days before Amy's due date (T-5), Amy feels large, sore, but excited about Joanne:
Feel rested, sore, and still quite preggo. Meeting with a doula in training today. Should be interesting - hopefully she'll be able to help me get the natural birth I want and avoid ALL unnecessary interventions.
Woot I gots me a doula!
Ug. Up at midnight with HORRIBLE heartburn even after 4 chewable heartburn tablets!! I thought heartburn was supposed to ease up when the baby was low but I guess mine likes breaking the rules.
Amy's due date came and went.  The waiting game set in.  Amy's status updates on Facebook became progressively impatient.

Pre-labor

For Amy, labor started slowly, over the course of about two weeks.  In the days before Amy's due date, she mentioned light cramping that would eventually lead to contractions that would open her cervix. Her husband, Bill, noticed that the baby had dropped significantly,.

(T-3) Well I could be wrong, but I feel pretty sure that I'm now in prodromal labor. For those not aware of what that means, that's early labor. But no need to get excited. If I'm right it could still be days away. With my first, I had prodromal labor a week before she was born. 
(T-1) Well when I took a bath this morning I felt like the baby wasn't as high. Bill confirmed, I didn't look as "pooched" as I have been so I'm assuming the baby has dropped. And I feel very very very tired. Standing on my feet more than a few minutes is exhausting. 
(T-1) Off to bed. Baby is still cooking but he definitely is lower. And my blood sugar has been awesome even though I haven't changed anything. 115 or less 2 hours after eating every time. Go figure.
On Amy's due date (T+0), Amy laments waddling:

I am Pengo, the amazing pregnant penguin. At least that's how I feel when I walk... *waddle waddle waddle*. I don't remember waddling quite this much before lol! Then again, this baby is low and has been for some time, so maybe that's why.

The day after Amy's due date (T+1), life goes on:

Well the baby didn't move quite as much last night as in several nights past. Still moving, but not so active. Could mean one of two things, and I'm leaning towards the positive - which is that he's resting for the big day. Got a prenatal today anyways and they'll do a non stress test.

Two days past the due date (T+2), Amy mentions how low the baby is:
The waiting game begins. Last night when Bill and I were walking around the pharmacy, I could feel the baby pressing down as I walked. I know it's going to be very soon.

Four days past the due date (T+4), the baby still has not come, and Amy's stress level is rising:
Getting mixed reviews on whether stress induces or hinders labor. Either way, trying to chillax. 
Twelve days past the due date -- that's a week and 5 days! -- Amy updates her friends and assures them that there have been no babies born (T+12):
Ok just posting an update because apparently if I don't people worry. :). Still preggo but I think the cramping may be getting regular. Should be soon!


Early labor

On the thirteenth day after her due date (T+13), the real early labor contractions came.  They were light, and Amy did the right thing: relaxed, ate, drank, and continued her positive attitude.

9:39pm
Been feeling some contractions tonight, close enough together to make me wonder. So I'm up, eating something, watching some tv, keeping hydrated for a bit, to see if it progresses to anything further, or if it's just false labor and my high hopes for baby due on T+14 lol. Will keep this updated.

11:49pm
Well they seem to be regular contractions at least. About every 20-30 minutes, just not near strong enough yet. Regular is good. Going to stay up a bit longer then get some rest. Could just be a T+14 baby yet!

The next morning (T+14), Amy finds the contractions have not developed a pattern (meaning that, if this were labor -- which it was -- it is still early labor):
6:20am
Baby is still moving and I believe I'm still feeling contractions. Half asleep right now seeing Bill off to work but have felt like two since I woke up. I can only assume they kept going overnight, they're just not strong enough to wake me up or keep me up. Would be funny if he was born at 2 in the afternoon today... You know... 14:00 military time. T+14. Ok anyways we'll see!
By the evening (T+14) the contractions were still present, but not consistent.  By now it was clear that this was the real thing: labor.  Her husband Bill, Amy, and I all joked on her status messages.
5:51pm
Contractions are now averaging about 10-15 minutes apart. May be tonight, maybe tomorrow... Time will tell!

Me 8:21pm
Let's see if you post all the way through labor. E.g., "Pushing. Baby at +2. Crowning eminent."

8:23pm
LOL I don't think my pain tolerance is quite that high lol. Right now I'm at the pain level of noticeable, I breathe through it and manage. I seem to remember it was like this a day before my first was born... The night I slept in the bath tub for 3 hours because I couldn't get rest any other way lol

Bill 10:04pm
Don't tempt her. She'll be in the middle of pushing and posting at the same time. You watch.

Me 10:33pm
I subscribe to this thread. Let the labor/posting commence! ;)

10:35pm
Lol just painful contractions at the moment ten min apart. Give or take. I'd rate it at about 5 right now. Well at least as far as I can remember. It was 6 years ago lol.
At this point, I thought I should ask about her doula.  Given that Joanne lives an hour and a half away, she should probably have been notified by now.  A surprising (for the readers) turn of events is unfolded.  But Amy still kept her positive attitude.
Me 10:36pm
Have you called your doula???

10:38pm
Turns out she won't be able to make it. She told me last night. She is now pregnant herself and has bad morning sickness. Sucks but it's ok. I'm just thrilled I went into labor naturally.

Me 11:10pm
Doesn't she have a back-up? :(

11:11pm
I have no idea. It was free and she was in training so I guess I can't complain too much.

That evening (still T+14), Amy turns in for the night as she normally does.
11:24pm
Going to try and get some sleep. We'll see how that goes.

Active labor

On the 15th day after her due date (Amy is now 2 weeks and one day late) (T+15), in the wee hours of the morning, Amy is awakened by contractions:
3:48am
Contractions are waking me up. I'm saying they're pain level 6 or 7 right now. I'm not quite ready to rush off to the hospital just yet though.
Nearly three hours pass; Amy decides to go to the hospital.  There, she is admitted, and is delighted to discover she is at 5cm -- active labor.  The current thinking is that hospitals will not admit women under 3cm dilation because the risk of unnecessary (and costly) interventions increases the smaller the dilation upon admittance.
6:17am
Going to the hospital now. Contractions are pain level 8 lasting a minute or longer and 5 min avg in between

6:24am
I can only go based on my experience with my first but with her they never got closer than 8 min or so apart during transitive labor. The pain feels similar now just they're closer together. Each pregnancy is different I guess. We'll see how accurate my self assessment is in like 40 minutes

7:39am
5 cm dilated

7:41am
My muscles are so tired already
A mere two hours later, Amy enters transition.  This is fantastic progress, and she should be proud (though, at the time, I am sure pride was the last feeling on her emotion stack).
9:51am
In [transition] phase now. 7 cm.
Half an hour later, during what women frequently consider the most intense part of labor, Amy posts a verbose status update.  She had just talked to her doctor, who requested antibiotics for Group B strep, and asked her to refrain from eating.
10:31am
Just got done talking to the doctor. I will be able to get pretty much everything I wanted except two things: I need an iv for group b strep but labor is almost over so that's ok. And no eating. They let me drink though

1:17pm
So sleepy
Four hours go by with no dilation progress.  Is this cause for concern?  No.  The cervix has two jobs in the first stage of labor: to dilate, and to efface.  This means it needs to thin out on the bottom.  The muscle gets displaced to the top of the uterus, where it will be used in the second stage of labor for pushing.  Before pushing can begin, the cervix needs to be 10cm dilated and 100% effaced.
2:41pm
100% effaced. 7 cm dilated. Baby at 0 station. Contractions make me feel like I'm going to die


Birth

Forty-five minutes later, after dilating 3cm and after just three big pushes, the next status update is one of jubilation (note the exclamation marks).
4:44pm
Baby is born!!! 3:28 pm!!!

7:58pm
Meant to post this earlier but he was 9 lbs 15.5 oz and 21.75" long. He's doing great. Both mom and baby's sugar was great (surprise surprise). He nursed well and fell asleep in my arms.

Facebook baby

Later, in the day after the birth, Amy explained: "I was not confirmed 10 cm when I pushed. I had been measured about 10 minutes earlier, and was still at 9[cm], but I didn't care."  The contractions pushing contractions were too overwhelming.  "Actually, after three hours at 7[cm] I pushed a little through contractions because it made it hurt less."
I pushed on hands and knees -- two pushes for the head then rolled over to my side for one body push.  When I got on my hands and knees I could not help but push.  They kept trying to tell me I'd know to push if I felt like pushing between contractions but that didn't happen. It was an incredible need to push during contractions that did it for me. Bill had a good analogy: He said that when I was squeezing his hand, he had to squeeze back as hard as he could so it wouldn't hurt. I told him that is exactly how I felt about pushing through contractions.
Amy added that the nurses begged her to get on the bed in the traditional supine (on the back) position, knees by her ears, to push.  Loathing this position, she abstained: "I can't."  Pushing, the head was born as she was on her hands and knees.  It was only then she was able to roll onto her side.

Congratulations, Facebook Mom!

Conclusion

There are a few key points to take away here.

The first is that babies do not always come on their due dates.  First babies are usually late; even subsequent babies can be very late.   Amy's baby came over two weeks after her estimated due date.  Due dates are just that: estimates.

Next, labor can start very slowly and progress over the course of weeks.  This does not mean that life stops: Amy showed how to handle a slow-starting labor and the rest of her life.  She did not let pre-labor alter her routine.

Then, the in-labor measurements of effacement and dilation are also estimates.  The way these are measured is largely subjective.  For dilation, the nurse or doctor inserts two fingers into the vagina, spreads them gently, and estimates the distance between them (this is why measurements are frequently preceded by "probably" or "around").  For effacement, the thumb and forefinger lightly pinch the cervix, and the doctor or nurse estimates how thin it is compared to other women's cervixes they have seen.  This is more of an art than a science, and is sometimes not totally correct -- as in Amy's case, in which she began to feel like pushing before the necessary 10cm mark.

Finally, Amy showed that, by listening to her body and under the care of her medical professionals, she could have the strong, empowered birth that she longed for.  Maybe it was not the ideal birth, both from the medical perspective (they wanted the baby out before the 2-week overdue mark, and they wanted her to push supine) and from her own (her doula did not make it, she had to struggle or argue for her body's rights, and she took some serious risks by skipping her prenatal appointments until so late in pregnancy), but it was within the realm of possibilities and, in the end, everyone was healthy, happy, satisfied.
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