Movie review: The First Years Last Forever

The First Years Last Forever. Directed by Rob Reiner.

My score

6/10

The continuum: Theatre - Matinee - Rental - Discount rental - Library

I would rent this movie.

Amazon link

The First Years Last Forever

My review

I rolled my eyes so hard when someone told me to watch this movie. My son is almost five months old now. What can I learn from this DVD, which came free in a box of new-baby literature at a second-grade reading level? But... I was relieved: my time was not wasted!

The First Years Last Forever is a light, refreshing 30-minute film providing practical advice about the newborn. As I mentioned, I watched this film when my son was nearly five months old, and it was still applicable and interesting. The movie talks about how to build strong attachments to a child, without giving any real advice on parenting style.

The movie is forward-thinking and touches on aspects of parenthood not only pertaining to the small week-old infant, but also to the child that has learned the word "no," and to the toddler. It was fun to see the interactions between parent and baby, and watch as babies of different ages were shown interacting with their parents.

Book report: The Breastfeeding Answer Book

Mohrbacher and La Leche League International, The Breastfeeding Answer Book, Third Revised Edition, 2003

My score

10/10

Amazon link

The Breastfeeding Answer Book

My review

This is a hard-core reference book. This is the book our local lactation consultants use. It is the single most complete, amazing breastfeeding resource I have found. Of particular note are the first few chapters, which discuss changes in our knowledge of breast anatomy, and what we know now. Understanding how the breast works puts so many other breastfeeding problems into perspective. Written with the lactation consultant or other support person in mind, the book first addresses active listening and how to ask questions without prying

This reference really does answer most breastfeeding questions, from nursing in the early days to teething, from nursing strikes to weaning, to the practical issues of nursing a toddler. Answers are comprehensive and supported by cited, peer-reviewed papers. Each paragraph in the book has a one-sentence summary in the margin.

Anyone taking breastfeeding seriously, as an art as well as a science, should get this book. You wouldn't take a circuit design class without buying a circuits textbook... similarly, you wouldn't consult a woman on breastfeeding without this book.

Book report: The Doula Advantage

Gurevich, The Doula Advantage, 2003.

My score

9/10

Amazon link

The Doula Advantage

My review

Why this book wasn't recommended instead of The Doula Book, I don't know. This fabulous paperback introduces the idea of a labor companion, and spends a chapter discussing the importance of touch and support in labor, citing many of the same statistics. Unlike The Doula Book, however, The Doula Advantage refrains from getting all hippie on the reader. Instead, the book discusses the practical implications of having a doula: what a doula actually does for a woman; how a doula supports a woman who chooses to or must have pain medication; how a doula supports a woman with a c-section; what a doula does for a birth partner; and how to hire a doula, including examples of interview questions, how much doulas charge, and how to cut doula costs by bartering and hiring doulas in training (like me!).

The Doula Advantage goes on to talks about postpartum doulas and what they do, and how they differ from lactation consultants, babysitters or nannies, and maids. The purpose of a postpartum doula is, just as a birth doula, to support the new mother. The postpartum doula does whatever is necessary for the mother or around the house to make the mother calm, content, relaxed, and focused on her new task at hand: taking good care of her newborn. Sometimes the task is to help with lactation; sometimes, she must help with older siblings or hold the new baby while mom takes a long shower; sometimes the mother's stress level is proportionate with the mess in the house or the number of dishes in the sink. Then, the doula will pick up the house, clean the kitchen, and prepare a healthy meal.

Another type of doula discussed is the antepartum doula. Slowly gaining popularity and recognition, the antepartum doula serves the mother-to-be before the onset of labor (although such a doula may stay and support the mother during the birth). Women on bedrest or with particularly difficult pregnancies benefit from antepartum doula support, as do single mothers and teens. An antepartum doula will meet the emotional needs of the mother-to-be, coming over to talk, cook some meals, and help prepare for the baby. She may hold a one-on-one childbirth class with the new mom.

I am a big fan of Rachel Gurevich's book as a practical overview of the benefits of having a trained labor companion and how to obtain one. If I were to teach a childbirth class, I would put this book on the reading list... and recommend it to all my clients.

Four months: a retrospective

Around four months ago, my son was born.

When they put him on my belly, immediately after birth, I was stunned. Was this squirmy, hot, wet thing the same thing that was my pregnant belly? No, you read that right: pregnancy was my belly, not what was inside it; the baby, outside it, bawling, came seemingly from out of nowhere. Why was he so hot and wet? And why was he crying?

Now he's four months old, drooling, laughing, and putting everything in his mouth.

At first I thought that six weeks was my favorite age. He was so portable. I took him with me everywhere: to classes, to meetings, even to a conference. He would ride in my little pouch on the bus and the motion of the bus would put him to sleep. He had no opinions. He was happy being fed every two hours (every. two. hours.) and changed when he pooed (every. two. hours.) and so alert, looking around with his enormous eyes.

But now, at four months, when he giggles and coos when he sees his papa and opens wide when he sees his mama; when he gets excited when he sees boobies (I guess most men do); when he grunts to indicate bedtime --- I think this is my favorite age. It's delightful to sort out his preferences, to play, to interact. That's something we didn't have at six weeks.

He's a puzzle, and the pieces are still forming. But as they do, we can snap them into place. The landscape that is my son is growing, and it's an exciting time.

Movie review: The Business of Being Born

The Business of Being Born. Directed by Abbey Epstein

My score

8/10

The continuum: Theatre - Matinee - Rental - Discount rental - Library

I would watch this movie at a matinee.

Amazon link

The Business of Being Born

My review

Why does the United States have a higher maternal and infant mortality rate than other first-world (and even some third-world) countries? Why didn't the midwives move into the hospital when births did? Why has the home birth rate fallen from over 90% to less than 1% in just a hundred years?

Ricki Lake and her cohort answer these questions in several ways. First, like everything else, it's economics. C-section rates are around 30% because it's fast, clean, efficient. Induction and augmentation rates are high because it gets the beds filled and emptied faster. Doctors charge more than midwives. Second, it's the marketing. Not only does "midwife" have a bad connotation whereas "OB/Gyn" has a good one, but also the entertainment industry as a whole shows labor and childbirth as a grueling, terrifying, awful process. Movie stars opt out of natural birth and schedule c-sections. Third, it's the education. Women simply do not know what their options are, what the hospital procedures are at the location they choose to give birth, and many OBs have never attended a normal, natural birth before.

Now, we take this one step further.

Most women in the US miss out on the critical moment of mother-child bonding. That is, the flow of oxytocin, the love hormone --- the largest amount of oxytocin a mother ever experiences in her lifetime, that happens the moment after birth. Women miss out because oxytocin is formed as a response to the pain of labor and subsequent birth. With an epidural, pain is dulled; the bonding hormone does not flow in such great volume.

A monkey momma has no interest in her baby if the baby is delivered via c-section.

I'm not saying we as humans don't overcome this. We do. Oxytocin is also released when breastfeeding. And what human momma doesn't think her offspring is adorable? But breastfeeding rates drop for babies delivered with an epidural, and especially for c-sectioned babies. We can see how effective, on a benefits-to-baby scale, a particular birthing method or establishment is by studying how long, on average, a mother nurses her young.

If as many mothers birthed at home here in the US as in the Netherlands, for example, more babies would be breastfed for longer.

So, overall, a good movie, and informative. I would have liked more of a research element. I had to dock a point for the graphic c-section footage (ew!).

Movie review: Orgasmic Birth

Orgasmic Birth, directed by Debra Pascali-Bonaro

My score

8/10

The continuum: Theatre - Matinee - Rental - Discount rental - Library

I would watch this movie in the theatre.

Amazon link

Orgasmic Birth

My review

This documentary is about the empowering birth experience. The catchy title draws you in, doesn't it? And yes, they show a real live orgasm. But that's not all that it's about. It's about how many women --- more than meets the eye --- can enjoy childbirth and allow the natural process to empower themselves. The woman is reborn into a mother as the child enters the world.

Like The Business of Being Born, this movie takes a look at modern obstetric care and is appalled at the devolution we as a nation have taken.

I watched this movie at the recent gathering of the local birth professionals community. I brought my son. I was so happy to see other women bringing their (albeit older) children to see what a birth looks like. Birth education is one of the fundamental things we as a nation lack.

I will watch this movie again... without the interruptions by a four-month-old that won't sit still.

Book report: Attachment Parenting

Ganju and Kennedy, Attachment Parenting, 1999

My score

3/10

Amazon link

Attachment Parenting

My review

Just read Sears' book, The Baby Book, or The Attachment Parenting Book instead. Sears is quoted liberally in this little large-fonted paperback. Shock value is used throughout to push the attachment parenting agenda. The book is missing a conclusion, and just abruptly ends after a half-hearted discussion of tandem nursing. The main topics covered by Attachment Parenting are as follows.

• Baby-wearing, or otherwise touching and carrying the infant and toddler
• Co-sleeping, sleeping near the child(ren), or sharing a family bed
• Nursing rather than breastfeeding - that is, "mindful parenting" (a term not mentioned here)
• Allowing the child to lead in - or, at least being respectful of - independence milestones such as sleeping alone and weaning
• Listening to the baby's cues and being respectful of the child

However, I was left with several questions and concerns.

• For child-led (or "child-respected") weaning, which occurs over a period of months, what happens to the milk supply?
• If a child eventually nurses only once every several weeks, does the mother pump in the interim, or allow the milk to dry and let the child nurse for comfort only?
• The book does not address how to properly feed an infant while an older child is nursing - in particular, the infant must be fed first, every time, before an older sibling is allowed to eat at the breast.
• How one balances parental need for space with a child's need for attachment.

The book uses guilt and shock to persuade the reader (who is already sold on the idea of attachment parenting, or else would not be reading a book called Attachment Parenting) that modern inventions, including but not limited to bouncers, swings, the "baby bucket" (removable, carry-able carseat), and strollers, are detrimental to a baby's development and only carrying or wearing the baby and co-sleeping are good for him or her.

A few interesting statistics were cited here.

• When looking at other primates to project a natural weaning age for humans, it seems like humans' natural weaning age is between 2.5 and 4 years of age. Some human cultures breastfeed their children to four years, but the mean American weaning age is four months. And that's with just over half of women even attempting breastfeeding in the first place.
• Korean children are held or touched 95% of the day. American children are held around 20%.

All in all - an incomplete book which I would not call a reference.

Book report: Ina May's Guide to Childbirth

Gaskin, Ina May, Ina May's Guide to Childbirth, 2003

My score

8/10

Amazon link

Ina May's Guide to Childbirth

My report

The book starts with some awesome birth stories - very inspiring and inspirational. The births are mostly set on The Farm, a birthing community deep in Tennessee, supporting natural midwife-driven childbirth. The following chapters aim to persuade the reader that "the body is not a lemon;" that in the vast majority of cases, natural childbirth is possible, and, moreover, preferable to childbirth with interventions. Ina May cites both The Farm and other natural birthing communities as well as European nations that have a high home-birth rate, low intervention rate, and maternal mortality rates drastically lower than that of the USA. In particular, she calls for greater accountability among medical professionals for maternal mortality rates - in the UK, for example, there is a complicated process of investigation into maternal deaths which results in a book called Why Women Die, which anyone can buy from the book store.

Ina May argues that labor need not be painful: that with relaxation techniques the "rushes" are felt more like intense pressure rather than pain. The Sphincter Law is that it's impossible to relax a sphincter under pressure.

Book report: The Thinking Women's Guide to a Better Birth

Goer, Henci, The Thinking Woman's Guide to a Better Birth, 1999.

My score

6/10

Amazon link

The Thinking Woman's Guide to a Better Birth

My report

Heavily biased towards natural childbirth, this book presents bulleted lists of pros and cons for interventions during labor and birth, and presents alternatives for undesirable interventions. If it weren't for the strong agenda, this book would be great. The book uses shock value by starting right off on the discussion of C-sections, then continues by discussing the interventions one by one in decreasing invasiveness. One of the main points in the book is that obstetrics is mismanaged, backed by overwhelming statistical evidence. I like the simple language and easy reading of the bulleted lists. If presented with an intervention, one can flip to the proper section and quickly research its pros, cons, and alternatives.